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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22809526">Childhood</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoMatterTheOceans/pseuds/NoMatterTheOceans'>NoMatterTheOceans</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Gen, Post-Book 2: Crooked Kingdom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 10:01:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,267</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22809526</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoMatterTheOceans/pseuds/NoMatterTheOceans</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Set about one year after the end of Crooked Kingdom. Kaz and Inej stake out a warehouse, and Kaz opens up.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>112</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Childhood</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi! I haven't written Kanej in a very long time, so I'm kind of anxious about posting this, please tell me what you thought :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Inej had forgotten how cold Kerch nights could be. Especially when you were sitting on a rooftop at two bells in the morning, waiting for a hypothetical shipment of smuggled jurda to come in from inlands. Kaz and her had been sitting here for almost an hour now, and Inej was seriously regretting accepting to accompany him on this stake out. It was her third time coming back to Ketterdam since she’d left on </span>
  <em>
    <span>The Wraith</span>
  </em>
  <span> to get her parents home, more than a year ago. Kaz had helped her a lot by gathering information during her time at sea, and now she was repaying the favor by assisting him with his errands tonight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So here they were, freezing in silence in the hope that they had the right information on the warehouse. It wasn’t how she’d imagined her reunion with Kaz going, but she knew she probably wouldn’t get anything better. They had grown closer during her last two visits, exchanging short hugs, holding hands while they were working or talking late into the night when he should have been working. They were closer, she wasn’t about to deny that, but it didn’t mean that Kaz wasn’t going to prioritize the opportunity for a deal over spending an evening with her at the Slats. He had changed, but not that much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had been silent for a while now, looking at the canals below to try to spot illegal activities happening on the ground. Kaz blew some air on his fingers to keep them warm, and Inej looked at him from the corner of her eyes. His hands were bare, as they had been all the time during her previous visits. She knew he still kept his gloves close, probably in one of his pockets right now, but it still warmed her heart every time she saw him without them. It was getting easier, she could see it. He was willing to shake hands with business partners when necessary, and he’d softly touched her more than usual since her arrival that morning. She smiled at the recollection of his hand on the small of her back during dinner at Jesper and Wylan’s, and decided to break the silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, these farmers, how long do you think they’ve been working with the Dime Lions?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kaz glanced at her before looking back down. “About three months, if what I heard is correct. Apparently, they negotiated a 40/60 deal with the Black Tips, but they got rolled over on their first shipment and only kept 5 per cent, so they struck another deal with the Lions. It’s supposed to be a 20/80 so not amazing, but it’s better than earning nothing, I suppose.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you want to offer them better money?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That's one option.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What's the other one?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steal some of their product. The warehouse isn’t that well-guarded and we have seen more bitter odds in the past. I'm going to propose them a change in alliance, and then we'll see.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Farmers are always getting conned in Ketterdam. They shouldn’t trust the gangs all together.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kaz let out a small, cruel laugh, and nodded. Then silence was around them again, but it seemed different. Kaz wasn’t watching the canals anymore, she could see it. His gaze was still on them, but his mind was elsewhere, focused on something else, and she didn’t know what. And then he talked again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I grew up on a farm.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Inej turned her head to him, taken aback by this sudden confession and the quiet voice he’d used. But she didn’t say anything, waiting for him to continue if he wished to. He knew she was listening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My parents had a farm in the countryside around Lij, in the south. It was a small farm, and we grew wheat, mostly. My mother died when I was very young, I don’t remember much about her. I remember she was tall, and strong, and she was always smiling at us, even when she’d spent an entire day out in the field, she would smile at us and teach us limericks while my father cooked. I was nine when my father died, so I remember more about him. He died in a farming accident, a stupid accident that left my brother in charge. Jordie…” he stumbled at the mention of his brother’s name “he sold the farm, and we left Lij to come to Ketterdam. That’s when everything happened.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He fell silent, and Inej kept looking at him, not knowing exactly what to do. What did you say when a ruthless Barrel Boss told you about his childhood? For years, Kaz had always said things hinting at the idea that he was born in the city, in the Barrel even. He never broached the subject of where he came from, who had raised and fed and clothed him before he earned the nickname of Dirtyhands. Inej had never known if he was lying until he’d told her about his brother, a little more than a year earlier. Then she had guessed there was more to his childhood than being born in a narrow street of the Barrel, but she hadn’t pried, figuring he would tell her when and if he wanted to. Apparently, he was ready now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he still needed her help. She could feel it radiating from him, the low panic at the idea of sharing too much, of being too vulnerable, too weak. He needed her help to get past it, needed to know he could be all these things with her. So she slowly let her hand move towards him, until her knuckles were brushing against his palm, and said:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Tell me more.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And so he did. Slowly, carefully, as if afraid to lose himself in the words, but he did. He told her about the harvest at the end of every summer, and running behind Jordie in the fields until they were both tired and famished and their mother had to drag them inside. He told her about the fireplace in their house, an ancient hearth where they would sit down in the winters, finding shelter from the cold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All the while, his hand was moving against hers, his fingertips tracing idle lines on hers, cautious, but firm, as if their skin touching was helping him get through the words. Inej didn’t move an inch, letting him take control of how much he could handle. Finally, after what seemed to be an eternity, he fell silent, and the sound of the chilly Ketterdam night wrapped itself around them once more. He stopped moving against her hand, but he didn’t take back his hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Inej turned to him, finding his eyes lost on the horizon, and said in a soft voice:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for telling me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kaz turned his eyes to her and gave her a smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They looked at each other for an eternity, their fingers interlaced, Inej’s heart beating a little faster than it should have.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then a noise came from the canals, and Kaz looked down, his brows furrowing in a focused expression. Inej took another moment to look at him, before she tore her eyes away and turned to the docks. A group of men were getting out of the warehouse they’d been watching, and a barge was approaching on the water. She felt Kaz smile beside her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s them, let’s go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She set off behind him into the night, with a new layer of understanding of the man in front of her, of who he was, and what he was willing to be for her.</span>
</p>
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